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Dear $$firstname$$,Greetings from the Laugh Letter staff. The last of the chocolates in that 5-pound box you got for Valentine’s Day may be getting a little stale now, but they’re still fresh compared with some of the groaners below. At least you know what you’re getting here, without having to take a bite first to see what’s inside!
A Cheesy Romance?A YOUNG LADY was dating two men—a dairy farmer and a poet. She had trouble deciding if she should marry for butter or for verse.Has Plenty of PullA SALESMAN drove his car into a ditch in a rural area. Luckily, a farmer came to his aid with his big strong horse, “Buddy.” He hitched Buddy up to the car and yelled, “Pull, Nellie, pull!” Buddy did not move. Then the farmer hollered, “Pull, Buster, pull!” Again, Buddy just stood there. Next, the farmer ordered, “Pull, Coco, pull!” Still, Buddy didn’t budge. Finally, the farmer yelled, “Pull, Buddy, pull!” The big horse easily dragged the car out of the ditch. The salesman thanked the farmer and then asked, “Why did you call your horse by the wrong name three times?” The farmer grinned. “Buddy’s blind,” he answered. “If he thought he was the only one pulling, he wouldn’t even try.” Danger Lurks BelowENTERING a little country store, a stranger noticed a sign that read, “DANGER! BEWARE OF DOG!” Inside, he saw a harmless old hound asleep on the floor near the cash register. He asked the owner, “Is that the dog folks are supposed to beware of?” “Yep,” the owner answered. “That’s him.” The stranger couldn’t help being amused. “That certainly doesn’t look like a dangerous dog to me,” he said with a chuckle. “Why did you decide to post that sign?” “Because,” the owner replied, “before I posted it, people kept tripping over him.” Knock, Knock.Who's there?Lettuce.Lettuce who?Lettuce in! It's cold outside.Come in from the cold and start thinking warm thoughts—plan your summer vacation with World Wide Country Tours! When you reserve your spot by February 28, 2006, you'll save $50 per person on any of our 2006 tours! Travel by train, boat or motorcoach to exciting destinations like: Canada...Watch the action at the finals of the Calgary Stampede rodeo...or visit captivating Nova Scotia & Prince Edward Island. Europe...Experience unique cultures, traditions and history in Germany, Switzerland and Austria...or take in the Wonders of Iceland’s breathtaking beauty. Save An Additional $200! PLUS... Don’t miss your last chance to save an additional $200 per person on the Alaska & the Yukon tour when you reserve by February 28, 2006. Visit our website for complete itineraries and to make reservations. Be sure to mention Promotion Code TL21 to claim this special $50 travel savings. Hurry, savings ends February 28, 2006.
1-800/344-6918 Stating Their CaseTWO GUYS were bragging about their home states. The first was from Texas. “Our strawberries are so huge that it takes a team of mules to pull one off the vine,” he boasted. The second guy retorted, “That’s nothing! In Iowa, where I’m from, we grow corn so tall that we have to climb the stalks at night just to let the moon pass by!” Wood You Like Some Milk?SOME small farmers never get board with showing off their dairy herd. To see what we mean, click here.
He Got the ItchHAVE YOU heard about the farmer who came up with an idea for a new crop? His plan is to cross poison ivy with a four-leaf clover. He figures he’ll have a rash of good luck.It’s a Hairy ProblemTHE FOREMAN in a widget factory noticed one of his workers walk out of the plant in the middle of his shift without punching the time clock. When the worker returned an hour later, the foreman asked him where he’d been. “I went to get a haircut,” the fellow answered, gesturing to his head. “You can’t get your hair cut on company time!” the foreman said. “Why not?” the worker asked. “It grows on company time.” Get Even More Laughs!SIGN UP for the humor newsletter “Laugh Lines,” packed with the hilarity you love from Reader’s Digest. You’ll get jokes and colorful cartoons—plus learn how you can get paid for your own funny stories! To subscribe, click here. Speak Up, I Can’t See YouYou know you’re growing older when: • Everything hurts, and what doesn’t hurt, doesn’t work. • The gleam in your eye is from the sun hitting your bifocals. • You feel like the morning after the night before, but you haven’t been anywhere. • Your little black book contains only names ending in M.D. • You know all the answers, but nobody asks you the questions. • You sit in a rocking chair, but can’t get it going. • Your knees buckle, but your belt won’t. • Your back goes out more than you do. • You sink your teeth into a steak, and they stay there. • The only whistles you get are from your hearing aids. Order the Moon PieDID YOU KNOW about a restaurant the astronauts discovered on the moon? The food was good, but the place didn’t have much atmosphere. Cat Dresses Up for Company
STANDING proudly by your door or on a table, “Caroline” Cat greets your visitors with feline friendliness. She comes with six dresses and purse outfits for your favorite holidays and seasons: Valentine’s Day, Easter, Spring, Fourth of July, Halloween and Christmas. Hand-painted polyresin; 12-5/8 inches high.
Order the Dress-a-Cat with Six Outfits from Country Store On-line. This email was sent to: $$email$$ HAVE A FRIEND who enjoys good clean fun? Feel free to forward this newsletter! If this newsletter was forwarded to you, please use this link to sign up for yourself. Please do not reply to this message to unsubscribe. If you do not want to receive further editions of this Laugh Letter, please use this link to unsubscribe. If you would like to change or edit your email preferences, please visit your To learn more about Reiman Media Group’s use of personal information, 
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