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Dear $$firstname$$,Happy Holidays from the Laugh Letter staff. ’Tis the season to be jolly, and with that in mind, we dug around in an old Christmas stocking and pulled out the gags below. (We also found a couple of stale hard candies covered with lint.) This newsletter may not be the best gift you get this year, but it’s better than a lump of coal! Three Wise WomenWHAT would have happened if it had been three wise women who visited the baby Jesus instead of three wise men? They would have asked directions, gotten there early, cleaned the stable, made a casserole and brought practical gifts. A Saucy ReplyA MAN’S dentures were bothering him. They had become all pitted and scarred. “What have you been eating?” asked his dentist. “Hollandaise sauce,” the man replied. “And no matter what you say, I’m not giving it up.” “Okay,” the dentist said. “I’ll make you new plates out of chrome. Everyone knows that there’s no plates like chrome for the hollandaise.” Staying Ahead of the WeatherAN OLD-TIMER walked into town each morning to buy a newspaper at the general store. One morning, the proprietor warned him that there was a blizzard predicted for the following day. “In that case,” said the old-timer, “I’d better buy two papers—I might not be able to make it into town tomorrow.” Let it Hay, Let it Hay...LACK OF SNOW doesn’t keep some folks from building big round characters in their yards.To see what we mean, click here.
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1-800/344-6918 Did You Ever Wonder...WHY is it that doctors call what they do practice? Where do forest rangers go when they want to get away from it all? Why don’t sheep shrink when it rains? Do vegetarians eat animal crackers? Zippy ResponseA YOUNG PUPIL was asked by his teacher to recite Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address. The youngster thought about it for a moment, then confessed, “I didn’t know he had moved!” Simply Stating the FactsTWO COWBOYS met at a cattle auction. “Howdy, pardner,” said the first cowboy. “My name is Tex.” “Well, howdy,” said the other. “Are you from Texas?” “No, I’m from Louisiana,” the first answered. “But what cowboy wants to be called Louise?” Get Even More Laughs!SIGN UP for the humor newsletter “Laugh Lines,” packed with the hilarity you love from Reader’s Digest. You’ll get jokes and colorful cartoons—plus learn how you can get paid for your own funny stories! To subscribe, click here. A Bit Shell-ShockedTWO FRIENDS were talking about problems they were having. “My brother thinks he’s a chicken,” said one. “Why don’t you tell him he isn’t a chicken?” responded the other. “I can’t,” replied the first. “Our family needs the eggs.” Simmer DownMAN does not live by bread alone. He has to handle some hot potatoes, know his onions, be worth his salt and try not to reach the boiling point. It’s little wonder that man is constantly in a stew. Rooting for a CureTHROUGH THE AGES, humans have discovered different ways to treat common ailments: 2000 B.C.—Here, eat this root. 1000 A.D.—That root is heathen. Say this prayer. 1850 A.D.—That prayer is superstition. Drink this potion. 1940 A.D.—That potion is snake oil. Swallow this pill. 1980 A.D.—That pill is ineffective. Take this antibiotic. 2000 A.D.—That antibiotic is ineffective. Here, eat this root. It IS the Best Medicine
THIS new softcover book celebrates 50 years of humor from one of the most popular features in Reader’s Digest. Laughter, the Best Medicine is packed with over 600 of the funniest jokes, riddles and more, submitted by readers and quoted from famous comedians. This 216-page collection measures 5-1/4 in. by 7-1/4 in. Order the Laughter, the Best Medicine from Country Store On-line. This email was sent to: $$email$$ HAVE A FRIEND who enjoys good clean fun? Feel free to forward this newsletter! If this newsletter was forwarded to you, please use this link to sign up for yourself. Please do not reply to this message to unsubscribe. If you do not want to receive further editions of this Laugh Letter, please use this link to unsubscribe. If you would like to change or edit your email preferences, please visit your To learn more about Reiman Media Group’s use of personal information, 
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