NOTE--To see an on-line version of this newsletter, copy this link and paste it into your web browser: http://www.reimanpub.com/rd.asp?id=450&firstname=$$firstname$$&emailaddress=$$email$$&refurl=$$refurl$$ Please do not reply to this email. If you have questions or wish to unsubscribe, see the instructions at the bottom of this email. ========== Laugh Letter - November 2004 Dear $$firstname$$, Greetings from the Laugh Letter staff. Okay, we'll admit it--most of the gags below are real turkeys. But that's okay...with Thanksgiving just days away, you'll have plenty of extra drumsticks! ========== Now That's Scary TWO BOYS were bragging about their grandfathers' talents. "My grandpa made a scarecrow so scary that it frightened every crow off the farm," boasted one boy. "That's nothing," said the other. "My grandpa made a scarecrow so fierce-looking that the crows brought back the corn they stole last year!" ========== Smooth Sailing What did the customs official wish the ship's captain at the entrance to the Panama Canal? Lots of "lock"! If you're looking for a travel experience you'll never forget, World Wide Country Tours offers you the only land & cruise combo package of Panama and the Panama Canal available anywhere! You'll see the ruins of old Panama City, the majestic mountains of El Valle, the rainforest on the edges of Lake Alajuela, and more-including an incredible coast-to-coast crossing of the Panama Canal! Plus, as a Laugh Letter subscriber, you'll SAVE $100 per person when you reserve your place (all it takes is a $250 deposit) six months ahead of your departure date. Simply mention the Promotion Code LL03. Click here for complete tour/cruise itinerary and savings information. http://www.countrytours.com/rd.asp?id=746 ========== World Wide Country Tours Exclusive Tour Operator of Reiman Publications 1-800/344-6918 ========== Pocket Change A PREACHER started his sermon by announcing that the congregation would soon start building a brand-new church. "We already have the money we need," he continued. "It's in your pockets." ========== Counting His Blessings ALBERT was talking with a pessimistic acquaintance who asked him how old he was. "I'm 76," Albert replied. "What have you got to look forward to at that age?" his friend asked. "Seventy-seven," said Albert. ========== Honest Mistake A HOBO walked up the lane to a prosperous-looking farm and asked the farmer if he could do some chores in return for supper and a place to stay for the night. "Sure," said the farmer. "Paint the porch in back of the house." A couple hours later, the hobo returned. "Done already?" asked the farmer. "Yup," replied the hobo. "And by the way, that's not a Porsche-it's a Cadillac." ========== Wood You Believe? WITH rising oil prices, you may need an extra truckload of firewood to keep warm this winter...and here comes one now. To see what we mean, visit: http://www.reimanpub.com/rd.asp?id=449 ========== Shooting the Breeze TRAVELING through western Nebraska, a tourist saw a man sitting by the ruins of a house that had been blown away. "Was this your house?" the tourist asked sympathetically. "Yup," said the Cornhusker. "Was your family blown away?" asked the tourist. "Yup--my wife and four kids," the Nebraskan replied. "Why aren't you out searching for them?" the tourist asked incredulously. "Well, stranger, I've lived in these parts for quite a spell. The wind's due to change this afternoon, so I figure I might as well wait here until it blows 'em back to me." ========== Miracle Cure A FELLOW who broke his arm asked the doctor, "Do you think I'll be able to play the fiddle after the cast comes off?" The doctor nodded. "Why, of course," he assured. "Great!" exclaimed the patient. "I sure couldn't play before." ========== How Dry Was It? KANSAS is known for its hot, dry summers. So when a stranger walked into the local cafe, he naturally started talking about the weather. "Is it always this dry around here?" he asked a rancher sitting next to him at the counter. "Naw," drawled the rancher. "My daddy told me that once back in Biblical times, when it rained 40 days and 40 nights, we got a quarter of an inch." ========== Heavenly Humor A POOR country parson finally scraped together enough money to visit the Holy Land. He especially wanted to see where Jesus walked on the water and sought out a boatman to take him to the place. "How much?" asked the money-conscious pastor. "Two hundred dollars," was the reply. The pastor shook his head. "No wonder He walked!" ========== Time for a Change A MAN went to the courthouse to get his name changed. "What is your current name?" inquired the courthouse clerk. "Joe Stinks," answered the man. "With a name like that, I don't blame you," the clerk replied. "What would you like to change it to?" "Bill Stinks," the man said. The clerk raised his eyebrows. "Why would you want to change your name from Joe Stinks to Bill Stinks?" he asked. "Because every time I go into the cafe, folks say, 'Whaddayaknow, Joe?'" ========== Glowing Greeters Welcome Guests YOUR holiday visitors will grin when they're greeted by a smiling snowman or a charming penguin standing on your front porch or along your walkway. Made of highly detailed, colorful poly resin, each holds a solar-powered lamp that lights the way all night. Snowman stands 19 inches high and measures 12-3/4 inches long by 12 inches wide. Penguin stands 14-1/2 inches high and is 21-1/4 inches long by 11-3/8 inches wide. To order the Snowman with Solar Lamp from Country Store On-line, visit here: click here To order the Penguin with Solar Lamp from Country Store On-line, visit here: click here ========== Featured Item: "Comedy" CD Set Visit here for Information: http://www.countrystorecatalog.com/rd.asp?id=1203 Cooking Sites All Reiman Sites Country Store Country Tours Reader's Digest THIS NEWSLETTER is from the editors of some of your favorite magazines, including Country Discoveries: http://www.reimanpub.com/rd.asp?id=455 ---------- Country Discoveries is for folks who love to explore scenic "off-the-beaten-path" places. Discover charming small towns...home-style eateries...cozy inns and more. It's perfect for planning your next getaway! To subscribe or give a gift on-line, visit us here: http://www.reimanpub.com/rd.asp?id=455 To visit our website, visit us here: http://www.reimanpub.com/rd.asp?id=456 ---------- Reminisce takes you on a pleasant stroll down memory lane. Written by its readers, each issue is packed with page after page of personal memories and heartwarming nostalgia. To subscribe or give a gift on-line, visit us here: a href="http://www.reimanpub.com/rd.asp?id=459">http://www.reimanpub.com/rd.asp?id=459> To visit our website, visit us here: http://www.reimanpub.com/rd.asp?id=460 ---------- Country Woman puts you "in touch" with other women who love country living as much as you do. Enjoy recipes, decorating, crafting and more! To subscribe or give a gift on-line, visit: http://www.reimanpub.com/rd.asp?id=457 To visit our website, visit: http://www.reimanpub.com/rd.asp?id=458 ********** This email was sent to: $$email$$ HAVE A FRIEND who enjoys good clean fun? Feel free to forward this newsletter! 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